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and that's all First, began

and it happened a miracle: it all started again, as if to scroll wheel. Again it was the session - and I somehow feel itself as a freshman and still am afraid that I was kicked out, and just as faithfully believe that my angels to me for the umpteenth time to help. I sit and listen to Luca Carboni - and I think as though I'm almost back to the beginning: when the sun was radiant, and life - tart. I feel the warmth of those places about which so dreamed of before - and, surprisingly, they are again warm me. I so passionately desire to pass the session - and at least one step closer to the time when my life changed. I look at myself - and I feel complete dissatisfaction with them, but I believe it will pass .. I really want to fix that feeling. learn as much as possible. pass an exam tomorrow. and if I still have time - to make something in this life.
I feel like slowly back to my innocence and lightness of being. I feel like crying, but I know it well.
Lord, thy ways inscrutable. Make everything as it should - because only you know how to correct. I only ask you to help me and this time with the session. do not let the hope that one day life radically changed. and save me from myself.